One year later.......

I have sat here with this blank screen and blinking cursor many times in the last several months. But it always resulted in me not finding the right words, getting sad, discouraged, confused...and then just closing up the computer. Feeling defeated.

It has been almost exactly ONE year since Mitch and I had that talk driving in our car. The one where he said randomly, "So, you know how we talked about adoption awhile ago? Well, I think I am on board." I vividly remember that day thinking, "This is it! We are doing this! By this time next year, we will have a baby girl from Ethiopia in our family and home with us."

So, here we are. One year later. No waiting list. No referral. No baby. 

This year has been a crazy roller coaster. If you have followed our story at all you have probably noticed that. And possibly have even grown tired of hearing about it. But if you haven't or if you are just really in need of some torturous recapping.......

-We decided on Ethiopia in September. Researched and contacted agencies. Found one we liked but were told our addition on our house had to be completely done before we could move forward. So we waited. But the money to finish our addition wasn't there. Actually money for our life in general was seeming to get more and more sparse. But we were faithful in saving and raising money. I was convinced Ethiopia was the place for us. And that specific agency was the way to go.

- Found out that agency had been wrong. Our social worker ultimately wouldn't care about the finality of our house, but rather about the emotional health of our family (and to clarify, of course wouldn't want rusty old nails laying around or anything...). So, we decided to find another agency and start everything again. We found an agency and a social worker. Then (and I need to clarify here that we really hadn't done any important paperwork stuff up to this point, just general things that hadn't required any fees) our new agency informed us that Ethiopia was slowing their adoptions down from about 50 a day to 1 or 2. So families would now be expected to wait up to 3 years for their child. That was a sad day. I had been completely convinced that Ethiopia was our only option. God knew better.

- We found out that Uganda had opened up just a short time ago and several agencies had started pilot programs there. Our hearts began to grow for Uganda. Meanwhile we were planning our fundraiser race (One Less 5K) and decided we would focus on that and see where we were financially after all of that was over. The race was incredible. We raised a pretty good amount of money. But were still fairly far (about $13,000) away from the amount that we needed. 

Which brings us to this summer (recap over and current story begins)......

We started slowly doing some of the "paper chase" stuff for our social worker and waiting on the actual adoption. Waiting for what? I'm not sure. There were lots of things to blame our waiting on. Money. Work. Illness. I am embarrassed to say, but feel the prompting to tell you, that I felt as if compared to all the other things happening with us and around us, this adoption felt......silly. selfish. and ill-timed.  And this made me....well....just flat out sad. I knew in my heart that this was part of our story. That God had called us to adoption. 

But, we (I believe I am speaking for both Mitch and I) let that idiot Satan get in our heads  and tell us "oh, just wait. you are kind of broke. and this is a really inconvenient time. for everyone. there are bigger things happening and it's really just pretty selfish of you to want to do it now. maybe someday soon. just not now." And let me tell you (in case you were wondering)......I know those words did not come from God.  There was never. not one time. a peace in my heart about it. I wrestled with it constantly. I felt guilty.  Mitch and I argued.  And if there is anything I know about God vs Satan it is this....Satan is full of lies and unrest. You will never feel peaceful about the decisions you make based on his prompting.  Even the thought "well, we will do it soon. You know, whenever (fill in the blank) is over...", never brought true comfort. And I am so glad it didn't. What a waste of a life is someone who allows Satan to talk them into being complacent. 

As our pastor always says (and I like to remind my sweet precious angel children often) "delayed obedience is disobedience". We may have thought we would "do it soon....", but deep in our hearts, we knew we were being disobedient. God called us into action. A year ago. Yes, we do completely believe that God used this last year to grow us. To change our hearts about certain things (which I will share another day) and to bring us to this place of repentance. 

We know this road is difficult. We know that our personal finances are not what we would love them to be. We know that we do not have enough money saved to pay for this adoption full out. But we also know that we cannot continue to live this life of disobedience. Whether well-intentioned or not, it is still a complacent life. And one we are ready to leave. 

So.........last Friday we mailed off our official application to Little Miracles International to adopt whatever God chooses for us (boy or girl, age 0-3) from Uganda and will be signing the contract by the end of this week. Our new home study will begin next week with a different social worker (We had to switch due to an accreditation problem with our previous one. I should also mention here that God saved us again from having to pay any serious high fees to our other social worker.). 

We have jumped off head first (which I guess is really just called "diving". Whatev. You know what I mean.). God has ignited our hearts again. He has redeemed us from the last 6 months of waiting on nothing. And has reassured us that He will provide for whatever He has called us to do. "God funds what He favors"....I have heard a lot these days. We are reminding ourselves of that daily. Especially when we see a pile of bills on our counter. :/

Thank you for reading. Thank you to our friends that have had to listen to the drama that seems to have been this story and for still being excited when we said we finally mailed off a FOR REAL application (you know who you are). Thank you for encouraging us and loving us no matter what. Thank you for sticking with these sinful humans who are just trying to figure out what God wants from them. I feel like we got it right this time. Finally. 

The race is over....time to move on

Hello friends,

If this is the second post that you are seeing from me on the same day but different blogs, I am sorry. I know there is really only so much of Katie Fickey one person can take, and I may be pushing the limit. But, my sweet precious 2 yr old decided to wake me up pretty early this morning (doesn't he know it's summer?) and then go back to sleep. So, I was left with some time on my hands to blog. And so I did.

Just a short one here. The race was a month ago and it was fantastic. Read about it here.

The adoption train is moving along again after being in somewhat of a stalled pattern for a few months. God has ignited my heart again (ie lit a fire under my butt...) and hopefully you will be seeing more frequent posts from me about our progress in the coming months.

Please continue to pray for us and for our child out there waiting for us.  Thank you friends!!

moving mountains

So, I know it's been more than two months since my last post.
I have wanted to blog. Really, I have.
But, the idea of writing a "catch up, sorry it's been so long" blog post was a little daunting. Those kind of posts are not quick. So, it kept getting put off. Again. And again. Until the catch up info was just too much and too overwhelming.

So........that brings me to today. Talking with my precious and very blunt friend Kyle, she basically told me, "shut up and do it. just jump in and get it over with". So, here I am.
With so much to say and not very much time to say it in. So, I'm going to give you the abbreviated version of our lives and our adoption happenings since my last post.....

1.) Found a new agency we loved. Decided Uganda was the place for us. Felt like that's where God has had our child all along.

2.) Found a social worker, got started.

3.) Found out said social worker couldn't be OUR social worker because Uganda is a Hague convention country and she wasn't certified there.

4.) Found another social worker. Loved her. Started paper work again.

5.) Meanwhile we have been planning for our upcoming fundraiser race...One Less. Lots. And lots. of work.

6.) Had an emotional breakdown wondering what God was thinking calling us to this.

7.) Recovered from said breakdown and realized God obviously knew what He was doing and was going to finish the work He started. So, buck up Katie Fickey. He's got it under control.

8.) Kept working on the race. A little over 2 weeks now until race day. We have been busy with banners and tshirts, balloons, refreshments, bounce houses, signs, music, a professional race timer guy, facepainting, volunteers, runners, walkers, promoting registration, inputting registration, etc.....all the things that come with organizing a race. Which is actually pretty fun. But, when you have three kids (oh and one of those kids is TWO), a part time job, a husband with a more-than-full-time job, baseball, super squad, birthdays, adding on to a house, keeping existing house clean and functional, and just life in genera,l it becomes a little overwhelming (hence the emotional breakdown).

9.) We have been praying and hoping for 100 runners (I don't know why that number, that's just the number that stuck) and we are still pretty far from it. But, we are still fervently praying that God will amaze us and prove that only He could have done it. It's gonna be a great day. I know it. Come be a part of it........one less.

10.) We have kind of paused the adoption stuff until after the race because of all the reasons I listed above. Life (ie the devil, I'm sure of it) has us crazy busy right now. As soon as the race is over, it will be show time and we are not going to stop again until this little one comes home.


So, side note.....

Something pretty cool happened tonight. Mitch and I and the crazies kids went to FBC Boerne Wednesday night youth to speak for about 2 minutes and promote One Less and talk about orphans a little. After we were done, we sat down and listened to a man give his testimony and sing a song to the youth. His appearance was only scheduled the day before and, to any other person would seem like just a coincidence that he spoke right after us, but we know it wasn't.  

This man was Wilson Bugembe from ......Uganda!  

He's kind of a big deal there. He's the most popular gospel singer and is also a worship leader and pastor at a church of over 5,000 (!!). He's a young, humble, precious, man, and was a ....guess...........an orphan. His entire family (mother, father, and FOUR siblings) all died of AIDS. His story was heartbreaking yet incredibly inspiring. I know he was there for the high school and middle schoolers, but I'm pretty sure God put him there just for Mitch and I. We spoke with him afterwards and were so encouraged by him and his story. 

God knows the perfect moment to remind us of His love, doesn't He? That He hasn't forgotten us and wants to encourage us to keep on this journey He started. I am going to sleep tonight a little more at peace that this is His plan for us. Thank you God for moving mountains to show us your love.

(Okay, so Kyle....I told you I couldn't do a short post. )

I won't wait so long until the next one, I promise. :)

because orange is my favorite color.

We changed the logo a smidgen....wanted to make it a little simpler! Thank you to my wonderfully patient friend Misty for letting me change my mind a gazillion times. 

AND if you haven't registered yet (which I know you haven't), stop on over HERE and sign up!! 

I promise it will be so much fun! 

Also, still needing volunteers and sponsors if you feel led to do so!! Please pray about how you can help! Thank you friends!!!

will move buttons for free...

God is moving mightily for the orphans in Ethiopia. There has been an incredible increase of adoptions coming out of Ethiopia in the last few years. God is stirring the hearts of His people to move to action for those abandoned children. Which is awesome, right?
Well, here is the sad news (the news I eluded to a few posts ago). For some reason, this influx in adoption in ET is cause for concern. The US wants to know why it is so easy. Is the ET government "rubber stamping" adoptions? (cause you know, it should be hard to rescue a child out of poverty and all...) Without going into a whole lot of detail. We were told last week by our agency (and then by another, and another.....I wanted to really make sure) that adoptions in Ethiopia are on shaky ground. Things are going slower and slower. There is now more required paper work. Longer waits for court dates. Longer time to get approved for child visas, etc.  Applications CLOSED to adopting girls.
I kind of knew all of that part and had just kind of thought that it was par for the course.
The next part, however, was a little more unexpected. What we were told was basically this....we could continue with the process, but would run the risk of getting done with our part and then Ethiopian adoptions could shut down (which is what all three agents felt like was going to happen, they all felt like ET will shut down before we got very far in our process.) We would be out time. money. and a child.

I was sad. Confused. What did this mean? Were we meant to stick it out? Were we meant to look elsewhere? But Ethiopia seemed so clear to me from the beginning. Had this changed? What do we do.....

We spent the following days praying and talking about what we felt like God was telling us through this. We had started this whole process in September and because of what one agency told me, we had paused all paperwork, etc because we thought our addition had to be completed before our home study could happen (which I have since found out is NOT the case). We could have been 6 months in already! Ugh!!
 This was frustration for me. This was clarity for Mitch. God had used that sweet, ill-informed lady to keep us waiting. Waiting for the right plan. The one to our child. And as we have since realized, our child will not come from Ethiopia. He/she will come from Uganda.
Yes, that's right. A whole different country. A whole different agency. A whole different plan. And we are pretty excited.

God led me to an agency with a new pilot program (started in September) in Uganda shortly after I found out about ET. Uganda neighbors Ethiopia to the Southwest, for those of you that didn't know. The process is similar, but a lot quicker. You cannot choose the gender of the child, which Mitch and I both agreed was better.  Families that started the program in September are already traveling at the end of this month to get their child!
When I first heard that, I had two different thoughts.
1- "Yay! That is super quick!!!"
2- "Grrr. Now why didn't we know about this then? we could be on that plane!".
And God said this (through some help from his ever faithful servant, my hubby)...
"Nope Katie. That was not the plan. Your heart wasn't ready for what I want to bring you. You were dead set on a girl. That might not be the plan. And I know you are okay with that now. So, stop trying to put me in a box ("check here for boy, check here for girl"). I will bring you the child I had picked out for you before you even knew I had called you to adopt. It might be a girl, but it might be a boy. It might be a baby or it might be two years old, I know what you can handle and I know what is the perfect fit for your family. You said yes to my call, so stop being picky and let me show you the one I have chosen for you."

Yes, sir.

So, here we go. On a new adventure! Home study starts this week or next. That process should be about a month. Then we wait for approval from the agency. Then....we wait for the child (eeek!!). Then, once we get a referral, we get our dossier together for the Uganda courts, make plans to travel and then go get this missing piece of my heart. The cost will be about the same. Which means we are still pretty far from meeting our goal. But, God willing, with our upcoming fundraiser (don't forget to register for the race!! over there to the right at the top of the page!!!) and some penny pinching, it can happen.

The picture we took in September ("we are adopting a little sister from Ethiopia") and the shirts we made may need to change, but the heart behind them is the same. We were called to bring another child home. Girl or boy. Ethiopia or Uganda. God had some lessons to teach us. He had to wait on us to learn them. But, now we hope we are on the right path and are excited to see will happen now.

And,speaking of those shirts....all you sweet friends who bought them to help us raise a little money...... if you want me to....I will move your buttons a little southwest for free. :)

Get your running shoes on......

Hello my friends! Wow! What a difference a few days can make! The last I wrote I was in the midst of a flu epidemic at my house and had just heard some very sad news (which I will share in my next post, I promise). What a downer that day was :/ Thank you for your prayers, as we are seeing healthier kids and mamas here at home and have a renewed joy and excitement about our adoption journey (BIG changes which I will share in my next post....I promise :) ).

But, on to the point of this super exciting post........

Back in the fall when we were discussing different ways we could raise the money to bring this child home, we briefly discussed the idea of having a small race (well, actually I said small, Mitch said triathlon....cause he's crazy). We discussed this idea with some of our precious friends who also had adoption on their hearts at the time. We decided it was a great idea!!....and then kind of let it go.

Fast forward to December. I began thinking about it again and all of a sudden this light went off. Why just stop at one race? Why not let God start something BIG?  Sure, we can put God in a box and raise a little money for our own adoption. OR we could let God do immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine (Eph 3:20) and begin something that could affect many families, not just our own. 

What if we made this race an annual race and each year a different family/families benefit from it? 

How many orphans could we help bring home? 

And so....One Less 5K/3K was born....

(thank you to my sweet talented friend, Misty for creating our logo!)

Through some late night pizza, to-do lists, research, timelines, and laughter, this little race became a BIG dream for us and our sweet friends, the Petersons (who by the way are beginning their process of adopting a child Internationally as well!! Follow their journey on the link above!). 

So, here are the details...

When is the race?         May 14, 2011 (yep...that soon! Mark your calendars!)

Where is the race?        Joshua Springs Park and Preserve (for those Boerne/San Antonio folk it is a new park across from the Waring/Welfare exit, just past PoPo's. )It is a Kendall County Park and is still under development and closed to the public. BUT we are able to have our race there, and let me tell you....it is going to be beautiful in May! I can't wait!!

What kind of race is it?      We have a rather challenging 5K course and for those of you that enjoy running and competition, it is sure to be a good run! 

 Don't love running and/or competition?? Then the 3K is for YOU!! It is a run/walk (whatever you choose!) and a KIDS RUN (ages 6 and up can compete in the kids run). Want to walk as a family with a stroller? DO IT! Want to compete against your friends in speed-walking and laugh the whole time? DO IT! The 3K is sure to be loads of fun!

How do I register?     We have registered our race with Active.com to help us with the logistics of it all. This site takes the registration info, and then prints out rosters, etc for us for the actual race. This is the link to our actual race, so GO REGISTER!!!....

ONE LESS 5K/3K     

How can I help?         Wow, where do I begin......We have many ways you can help! 

---We are going to be relying mostly on sponsorships and donations to make this thing a reality. We are in the process of partnering with a non-profit organization so donations will be tax-deductible. We have written a sponsorship letter and have included a sponsorship/donation form to give to local businesses that might want to help fund this race. So, basically what I am asking is (as uncomfortable and against my nature as it is) we need some sweet precious souls who would be willing to commit to contacting 3 or 4 businesses they might have some sort of connection with, and asking them if they would be willing to sponsor this event (gulp. I don't know why, but that seems so intimidating to me..) 

As part of their sponsorship, their names/logo would go on the back of the event t-shirt as well as the ability for them to put their own signage up at the race. If you are interested in being one of these precious angel souls, please contact me via email (katiefickey@yahoo.com) and let me know, and I can give you the sponsor letters/forms.

---We also need volunteers for the actual race day. We need people willing to give up a Saturday morning (yes, I know it will be baseball season) to hand cups of water to runners, hand out race packets, stand along the trails and direct people, direct parking, and the list goes on and on. If you are interested in this, please let me know and I will give you a job!!! (Oh, and you get a volunteer tshirt as well! Totally worth it then, right? :) )

---Pray for us and the event. This is crunch time. Most races are organized at least 6 months ahead, and we are far from that. We have most of the details ironed out, but the actual logistics of it could be a nightmare, and I want it to be a joy. Pray that God moves in the hearts of the local people to give generously. Pray for our community to be reached for the sake of the orphans of this world. We feel like this could be something big if we trust in God to do the stirring. I would love to be able to look back in 15 years and see all the different families this race and this community helped bring home. Maybe even your child???? Don't shake your head! It could happen to you!! One year ago I would have shaken (shook??) my head too. :)

Ok, so I have lots more exciting news to post. (Like BIG. EXCITING. NEWS.) But it will have to wait for another day :)

Please consider what your role in this (I hesitate to say "movement" because it sounds so presumptuous, but God willing, it will be!) thing is. I am excited to see how God is going to move! Come be a part of it!!

wondering....

When talking to our new (probable) agency today, I found out some information that troubles my heart a little. I don't really want to go into details right now, but Mitch and I need you to pray for us. We are now faced with some pretty big decisions that could change everything for us.  We want to make the right decision and want to follow God's will and not our own (which in reality, is pretty hard...just being honest) and also need to make this decision within the next few days.
So, please pray for us to hear God's voice quickly (I know, it's all in His time anyway, but right now I am begging for a timely answer) and clearly.  Thank you sweet friends :)

We also have some exciting things planned for the very near future as far as fundraising goes, but can't give a whole lot of details on that either (super informative post, eh? are you wondering why you even bothered reading it?....) It's not like it's top secret or anything, we are just trying to get the details hammered out so we don't misinform anyone. Little hint?? 5K/3K

Saw this video today almost immediately after having that somewhat troublesome convo with our agent. It gave my heart some reassurance to see it. Adoption is not always the answer for orphaned children, but for us it is the one God called us to. What is He calling you to?


Ethiopian Orphans from Simon Scionka on Vimeo.