As I am typing this, I can hear Mitch's hammer and saws through the walls of our existing house as he works away his Saturday on the addition. I love him and his commitment to not only provide daily for our family, but also help fulfill our dream of a bigger house for a bigger family.
I am convinced that there are not many men in this world that would work a pretty laborious job all day, then come home only to labor some more on his own house until there is just no daylight left and the flood lights he has are no longer enough, have just enough time to eat, play with his kids a little, shower, go to bed, and then get up and do it all over again. 6 days a week. And do it all (well, mostly....he's not perfect you know...) with a steady, giving heart.
I know when he started this addition many, many months ago, he had no idea (I didn't either) that God would eventually fill it with another child from across the world. It has been a painful journey for us. It has burdened us financially more than we ever thought possible, it has stolen time from us as a family, it has made us not-so-popular with the neighbors, and it has been the root of most of the arguments and stress we have had over the last year and a half.
BUT, all of that is nothing in the grander scheme of things, we know. It is still a thorn in our side, but for different reasons. It is the one thing (besides the whole money thing...) that is keeping us from moving forward with the adoption.
So, this is where this brings me today.....
We are currently praying through the possibility of changing agencies. We are not committed to the one we had previously chosen, because they had told us to not even bother sending in our formal application and fees until we were done with the addition. Which kind of makes sense, but is kind of frustrating as well. We know that once the paperwork business starts, it will still be AT LEAST 9 months until we would get a referral for a child. So, of course the addition would be finished way before that time. So, it has been a little frustrating knowing that we can't even begin a home study until we are completely finished with the addition. (sidenote......our existing house is completely finished and safe. We will not open our house to the addition until the very end of the construction, so there is no open framing or exposed wiring right now or anything like that that would make our home dangerous).
So, while this has all been churning in my head for months now, I have recently been thinking that maybe it is our specific agency that we have chosen that is being the stickler. Maybe not. But....maybe??
After some reading and researching, we have found another agency that may work with us a little bit more. I am not totally sure, but I am hopeful.
I laid in bed last night begging God to close this door too if he was really using this waiting time for a reason....to grow and change us and prepare our hearts for this child.
But, I also begged Him that if it was His will, that He would show us favor in regards to the agency's leniency in our home study.
I don't know His answer yet (after all, it hasn't even been 24 hours.....see? maybe I am supposed to be learning patience in all this...) but will you join me in praying this for our family? I will be speaking to the new agency this coming week and will know more after that. But, in the mean time, will you pray for God to show us what He wants.
Patience?
or Action?
Both are equally important, I think. I just want my eagerness to be of Him and not myself.
I also am asking for you to be praying about a possible fundraiser that we are working through. It would be quite an undertaking, but I feel like God has given us this big giant dream for it, and I would love for Him to see it to fruition.
I am so VERY grateful for some of the people God has put in our lives lately. I realized today that God ordained some of these special friendships for this specific time in our lives and I'm not sure what we would do without those who have come beside us on this journey (including our wonderful, loving, and supportive families).
Thank you for your love and support and prayer.
